My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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