Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
