porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
