i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
