Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
