There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
