Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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