its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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