Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
