Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
