she was so not down for the gang bang
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
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