You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Randomize
