Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
