Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
