Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
