Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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