Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Boobs are out for the taking
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
