he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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