I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
...so i touched it.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
