I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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