He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
