I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
