I have demons in me.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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