is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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