just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just cut my nipple shaving
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize