Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
