Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
