Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
This house was built for laser tag.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
