I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
