Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
so let's talk penis.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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