come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
