I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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