it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Can you bring me the toilet please
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
