he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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