Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
