after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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