i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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