Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize