Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
