How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize