Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
