dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
