If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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