Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
