and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
