Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
its liver damage thursday
Randomize