Already got asked if we're dating
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
