woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Randomize
