is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize