You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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