somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
